• Me: I'd like a Coke.
  • Waiter: is Pepsi okay?
  • Me: yeah, she's fine. the surgery went well and she's looking at a full recovery.
  • Waiter: fantastic. I can't wait to see you two drop by here again. she's a nice gal even though she's got an odd name. I'll bring your Coke around in just a moment.

nintendontdodrugs:

Chris Ramsey calling out Katie Hopkins for her views on fat people.

(via smashness)

megachikorita:

you kids these days with your rapidly growing concern for the state of the world and your knowledge of important issues at increasingly younger ages despite having been told your opinions don’t matter by the adults who put you in these situations

(via smashness)

  • person: do you have tumblr?
  • me: yes
  • person: whats your url?
  • me: no

twostrict:

we ain’t them

(Source: kenyanmade, via fuckyeah-childishgambino)

red3blog:

See, when white guys commit felonies against black people or sexually harass women, those are just “pranks”. Those are the rules.

(via smashness)

therealhamster:

anyone wanna make out… a check to me for 500,000 dollars

(via nightisalive)

englishbeverage:

So there’s this party down at the pier and we can go there if you want or just hang here. Cause I have discovered it’s not the place or the surrounding but what you make of it. Just long eye lashes and retro dresses. Current situations but I’m not into it. Only so many days to flee from the possible awfulness and to make your life great if you want that.

(via dwightschrutetouchdownpass)

concluded with a frightful rendition of ‘O Flower of Scotland’
Well I think that’s pushing it a bit.

grrr0ss said: don’t be lame post long, detailed, monologue about yrself

Well I guess I could

grrr0ss asked:
♀ æ $ &(like right now yea)

Sorry I don’t know what that second one means.

Like, I reckon the people who make Embarrassing Bodies probably have the best of intentions - but it just feels so demeaning.

"Part of me wants to drop out of college and go travel the world.
Part of me wants to work really hard in college and change the world.
Part of me wants to not work hard at all and marry some rich guy.
And the other 97% of me just wants to sleep."